Staying on the Upside: Making Plans for 2013

I’ve got loads and loads of rough drafts that are begging to be posted on my blog, but something keeps telling me to save them for a casing made of ink, paper, glue and spine.

We’ll see.

All I know is that right now, I am feeling elated– not because so many fabulous things have happened to me, but because almost everything that could go bad has (save my health and furry miracles {knock on wood}). I’m not in the mood to list them all off, but let me just say that this morning started out by my leaving the house, in 25-degree-weather, to attempt to drive my car to the mechanic. I say “attempt” not only because I have been driving on bad tires with brakes so horrendous that grinding and skidding could be heard while driving five miles per hour… a sound so horrific that I was convinced, the engine would fall out from under my car while on the highway, causing a pileup that would make the evening news. I had even gone to the shop, days earlier, just to hear what I already knew, “You can’t drive this car, like this.” (It would’ve been amazing to see the look on Wally, the foreign mechanic’s face to know that I drove through a snow storm with the brake, oil and other mysterious light shining on my dashboard.)

But I digress…

As mentioned, I attempted to get my metal disaster on wheels to the corner gas station for repair, not only because of its malfunctions, but also due to the fact that as I started the car, along with the heat and defroster to help remove the sheet of ice on the windshield, I closed the door, allowing my “helpful vehicle” to voluntarily lock the doors with the notion that I was safe and secure inside… NOT!

The only damn things being protected from outside forces (including myself) were my handbag, house keys, wallet and cell phone… all of this and THE CAR ENGINE WAS RUNNING!!! It was happily purring on a tank of gas, close to three-quarters-full (thanks to my spouse’s contribution)… something I was trying to live on until payday.

I was grateful for the two, kind strangers who TRIED to break into my vehicle, as well as my ever-so-wonderful neighbor who called his own roadside service company, covered by his insurance to come and help me.

Really, I am truly thankful and would’ve felt far more warm and fuzzy about the generosity of others if not for the fact that what was supposed to be a 30-minute-wait turned into THREE-AND-A-HALF-HOURS and the locksmith only arrived after I walked to my mechanic’s place -with numb toes- and got him to drive me home to break into the car and take it for servicing. Again, I’m happy that I got help, but PISSED that my neighbor used his insurance for unfashionably late assistance.

I know, I know… this sounds more like one of my classic “bitter-bitch rants”, but it’s not; I’m getting to the “upside”.

The Year of the Dragon… blasted 2012, has given me so much gut-wrenching turmoil that I am almost doing cartwheels with bliss– No, this is not delusional psychosis; Though I’ve been fortunate enough to have never completely hit “rock-bottom”, I have definitely felt the chill of its cold, jagged stones teasingly scrape my cheek and NOW am so utterly appalled by current events that I have no choice but to retaliate on the Universe’s evil cousin, “Down on Your Luck” and get back in control.

This is not a New Year’s resolution– It being close to December is just a coincidence.

My move to Denver and ending up in graduate school is solely a pleasant and unexpected journey.

Being juxtaposed between conditional and unconditional love is a fabulous experience that has afforded me great, spiritual treasures.

This is the restructuring of thoughts, words and rough drafts with a lack of spine and glue to weather a long voyage–

As urgent as it was for my wheels, the same can be said about this existence… it’s time to take my life to the mechanic.

I will be triumphant.

©2012 Heidi Rodney-Nakanishi and ChocolateGeisha Spills the Sake!™


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© 2010-2020 Heidi Rodney-Nakanishi and ChocolateGeisha Spills the Sake!™ All images are copyrighted by their respective authors.

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